The Colors are Golden

FUCK. I just lost the three paragraphs I typed. WordPress!!! Ugh. Moving on…

I’ve been walking 50 minutes a day to alleviate the symptoms of seasonal affective disorder AKA seasonal depression. AND to give my dog exercise. Anyway, I don’t think walking has helped much so far. I’m not really depressed. Thank god. But I can tell I have the winter blues. I will probably keep walking as long as it is over 30 degrees because my dog really likes it. However, he is a corgi mix, and they are known to have arthritis. 😦 So I don’t want that to flare up due to the cold weather. I have to be careful. There’s no way I’m walking by myself. I would feel SO guilty for not taking my dog.

I would buy one of those lamps that bring in fake sunlight. I do have a $15 promotion from Amazon, but the item must cost at least $30, and the lamp I want is only $28. So ugh. Not sure. If I feel horrible, I might just buy a lamp. But most days, I’m okay. It’s just a few days that suck. I know February is going to be tough because February always sucks. It’s so cold and blah. I will probably take off a few days during that month.

I just got back from the bank. I deposited $15.90 in the bank. Woohoo! 2.90 of that was in change (including 10 pennies). I was slightly embarrassed to have all that change. But if I found all my change it could have been worse. I can’t wait until I’m financially doing better which should be February or March. I just don’t want to have to count pennies for groceries. And I don’t want to have a negative bank balance ever again. That would be nice.

Election 2020: I’m sad that Kamala Harris dropped out even though I wasn’t going to vote for her in the primary. I’m really bummed that Julian Castro won’t be at the debate next week. There’s not much going on that I care about. I just hope Biden is not the nominee. Please! I’m begging America. He’s not mentally up to it. So nothing’s really changed. I’m still rooting for Elizabeth Warren. Oh, I’m surprised Yang made the debate, but Booker didn’t.

This week I…

Music of the week: Rachel Platten, Maggie Rogers, Ariana Grande, Mariah Carey, Carly Rae Jepsen, Bishop Briggs, Jussie Smollett, Pistol Annies

TV of the week:  Survivor, RHoP

Podcasts of the week:  So You Wanna Be a Witch, Crimelines, Cold, Dateline, True Crime Garage, Pod Save America, Tarot for the Wild Soul, Generation why,

Books of the week: I need to read new books! Anyway, currently reading:

Yes, I’m working on creating a Saturn Return workshop. It’s going to be released in January. It will cost $15 for just the workshop (and eBook). For all that plus a personalized written report, it will cost $30.

Weekend Plans: Working at my day job (for free) and on my workshop. What else? It’s been raining a lot, so probably not a lot of walking. I’m buying food for the next two weeks tomorrow. I’m going to be frugal.

Right now, I’m going to restart my computer because it’s running really slow. Thanks for reading. Have a nice week! 🙂

Treehouse

Can anyone explain to me why women are still putting up with periods? It’s BS. Okay, if I knew I wanted kids, I wouldn’t get on birth control to stop my period. I just wouldn’t. I’m not a doctor, but infertility is such an issue these days. I wouldn’t risk it by being on birth control for years. But I’m 100% sure I’m never having kids, so this isn’t an issue for me.

I’ve been on this BC for about two years, and now I haven’t had a period in TWO months. That’s a huge win!! I hate having a period. So I’m like, finally! I tried Depo Provera to stop my period. It didn’t work. It might be suitable for birth control, but ugh, it didn’t work for stopping my period. It made it worse.

So my point is, for a lot of women, having a period is voluntary. Why do they choose to have one? Have they been brainwashed? I have no idea. Anyway, I’m sure my period will probably eventually come back for a month or so. 😦 As long as it goes away again, I’m fine. This is the first time I’ve skipped two months in a row. It’s been every other month these past 6 months.

I’m not filing bankruptcy…as long as my bank account doesn’t go negative again. Unless something unexpected comes up, December should be fine. In January, some asshole is going to try to get $420 from me. I’ve already talked to him once. (Hence calling him an asshole – ha). So I have to ask the bank to stop the transaction, OR I’m going to be negative about $300 if my budget is right. I have to stop it.

Speaking of unexpected things, I should probably file bankruptcy for that reason. But I’m going to try not to. I just hope nothing surprising happens.

I’m working on a project for my biz. Unfortunately, it won’t be ready until February or March. It’s a 12 part series. I have to record 12 videos! So yeah, it’s a big project. I’m currently working on the sales page and getting excited. But I won’t feel like it’s really real until I finish recording the first video. After the first video, the other 11 will be a breeze.

I should have done this instead of working on an astrology course. I’m not rereleasing the astrology course until October 2020. I have to recover from this last release. Creating a course is HARD. No one really said that. They said, “A course is hard to sell.” Well, 6 people bought the course from me. So selling wasn’t the problem. It was the actual creating and teaching. ARGH. I want to say never again. But I kind of promised these 6 people, I would redo the course, so I will. And I’ll have a good time doing it. I just need a break from that.

Anyway, I’m really excited about the series. I just feel a bit anxious because I haven’t started creating the videos. Like I said, if I don’t make $3600 (in revenue)  next year, I will probably hang it up. I might try something different. Or I might take a year off and then come back to astrology or go into something else. I know other modalities. So I don’t have to stick with astrology. I just really like it.

Election 2020: Still bummed Julian Castro wasn’t at the debate. How dare Gabbard and Steyer be there, but not Castro? I loved the moderators. I feel like Kamala stood out the most (in a good way). Yang didn’t get much time. Booker was funny and made two good points (not that I was counting). Biden wasn’t good, but who cares? He could shoot someone on 5th avenue and still… 

I really enjoyed it overall. I watch the news too much to find it informative. I’m glad they didn’t spend too much time debating healthcare.

I don’t care about Trump, so whatever. I did watch about 50-60% of the impeachment hearings. I found that informative because usually when Trump is mentioned, I tune out.

This week I…

Music of the week: James Arthur, Tanya Tucker, Lana Del Rey, Ariana Grande, Sara Bareilles, Carly Rae Jepsen, India.Arie, Jessie Ware

I’ve been listening to Sirius/XM radio, so these results aren’t exactly accurate. (I can’t track what I listen to on there).  I have a FREE 3 month trial to Sirius. I plan to enjoy every second before I cancel.

TV of the week:  This Is Us, RHoP

Podcasts of the week: Don’t Talk to Strangers, Polyvagal Podcast, So You Wanna Be a Witch, Crimelines,

Books of the week: 

  • Her One Mistake by Heidi Parks – Liking this more than I thought. Well written
  • The Good Guy by Dean Koontz  – not sure I’m going to finish this. But his books do sometimes start slow. I just don’t have the patience for slow starts right now.
  • Letting Go by David Hawkins

Weekend Plans: – I worked for free at my day time. Then I worked on my biz. So basically working. I have astrology class tomorrow, so I will get some knitting done. 😉 I love that I can knit and pay attention. I’m just thankful that I may not have to get a part-time job. I need time to see if I can make revenue.

Thanks for reading! Have an awesome week. 🙂

If Walls Could Talk

I’m broke. Not fake broke like people in the middle-class people say. My bank account is going negative every 30 days. Luckily I work for a company that gives me benefits with this particular bank, so I’m not charged a big fee for overdrafts. I didn’t even know that when I switched banks.

Anyway, something has to change. I should just file bankruptcy. That’s the SMART step. I talked to a bankruptcy lawyer, but he was rushing, and I didn’t understand how much I had to pay him. I know it’s $300 a month, but for how long? Am I paying back any of the creditors? If so, then I may as well do what I’m doing, which is debt consolidation. Why should I stop paying my bills for 6 months AGAIN? I had to do it for debt consolidation. I’m a Taurus. It doesn’t feel good to NOT pay bills. It feels like shit, and I would like to not feel that way again.

I had to cancel Netflix. ROFL! Woe is me. I had to cancel my therapy appointment, and I will probably cancel my therapy appointment for December. I don’t have food enough for two weeks, but I’m “borrowing” from my mom. I say borrow because I will pay her back. It depends if/when I get a PT job. I applied for two. I passed the test and even had an orientation date for this Wednesday. BUT the hours are horrible for someone with a full-time job. The pay is $16 an hour for overnight but ugh, I NEED MY SLEEP. I’m on these new meds and sleep is necessary.

The medication situation is not that great. But that’s not important now. I can’t NOT take my meds or I will have nightmares. That means I’m waking up every 5 minutes. My legs shake. Etc. So I just keep taking the meds. I have to talk more about this later. The point is that the medicine makes me very sleepy and I have to take them.

Anyway, tomorrow I’ll be near a mall for hours while I get my car inspected. I can’t buy anything, but I’ll see if any of the big stores are hiring. Sorry, I can’t do the small boutique-like stores. I can’t. It’s hard enough being around people at all. The small stores terrify me. :/ But I feel like I could probably find a good small store that I like. I don’t know.

I’m going to work on my astrology stuff* for the first few hours. I’m getting to the dealership at 7:30 AM. I’ll probably work on stuff until 10AM and then head to the mall. It would be nice if my car were done by 10, but I know this place.

*I get paid my Teachable on December 1. I’m so pissed they are holding my money for so long. I launched the class 6 weeks ago. They did pay me $46 almost immediately, but they are holding the other money by the sales made by PayPal. So I do have that money coming in. Of course, it’s already gone, but whatever.

I’ll just be happy if my bank account doesn’t go negative again.

I’m off from work until Thursday! YAY. And then next week is Thanksgiving. Another two days off. Woohoo! I have calls scheduled with ideal customers all day on Tuesday. I hope I get good feedback. I hope one of these seven people is an ideal customer. I already talked to one person, and while she’s not my ideal customer,  she gave me a TON of ideas. She told me stuff I never thought about!

Btw, to be an ideal customer, the person must believe in astrology, searching for something more in life,  be open to learning about it and be spiritual. Sometimes I wonder about the spiritual part, but whatever. I also say “bonus points if you like thrift stores”. LOL. Seven calls???! I never talk to seven people in a day. I’m such an introvert. And most of these calls are taking place on Zoom! I know WTF was I thinking? So that is what I’m doing on Tuesday.

This week I…

Music of the week: Emily James, Taylor Swift, Lauren Daigle, Ariana Grande, Chris Stapleton, India.Arie, Jess Glynne, Lana Del Rey

TV of the week:  Survivor, This is Us

Podcasts of the week: True Crime GarageSo You Wanna Be a Witch, Crimelines, Why is This Happening?

Books of the week: 

  • Her One Mistake by Heidi Parks (thriller) This book is okay so far. It’s trying too hard to be like Big Little Lies.
  • The Good Guy by Dean Koontz (thriller) – I grew up on Dean Koontz, but I haven’t read him in years.

Weekend Plans: Well, today is Sunday. I’m just glad that I have the next three days off. I’ve been working on a plan for SWT (my online biz). I sort of have a clear goal of how I want 2020 to look. My minimum revenue goal is $3,600 for the year. If I don’t make that, I will probably hang it up. I’m relaunching the online course in October 2020. Yes, that is almost a year from now, so I’m not counting on that for money. I have a new idea that will launch this upcoming January. That is where I hope to make money. BUT I have to talk to my ideal customers first to see if my idea matches their wants/needs.

I’m going back to working on my 2020 business plan tonight….as much as I can without talking to potential customers. I have everything set up in Notion. Notion is a life changer. I’m not going back to paper planning EVER. It is the best invention, and I can’t believe I didn’t know about it until two weeks ago. I now have a bullet journal set up on there. Who needs paper? If you join using that link, you get $10 extra storage, but Notion can be easily used for free. It still has ALL the functions free, just less storage. You have to see it to know what I mean. In other words, I suck at explaining how Notion works!

Thanks for reading! Have a wonderful week. 🙂

I let you mess with my head

I’m listening to Gabby Bernstein because people are fucking assholes. I want to rant about Libras and Capricorns. You already know how I feel about Aries. But Libras and Capricorns THINK they are nice, but they can be mean. I have never met a Libra I would consider nice. They are smart and look down on people not as smart as they think they are. They are full of sarcasm. I hate that. Condescending BS.

You know what? These fucking people aren’t worth my time. Obviously. Right? I had a good day on Friday and a decent, productive day today. FUCK THEM!

I always remember who starts things. Always. I DIDN’T DO SHIT TO YOU.

I HAVE SHIT TO DO.

I have two live (as in on video) tarot readings to do. Yes, I’m scared shitless. And I feel like these people are pulling me away from FOCUSING. I kind of tested myself and I feel decent. One reading is tomorrow (Sunday) and the other is Tuesday. I’ve got this.

Paypal Credit can suck it too! I’m not paying them this month. I don’t have the money. I was going to pay them $30 or $60, but that doesn’t cover the minimum. My therapist would congratulate me on not paying. LOL! I will pay them eventually. I hope it is within 3 months. Ideally, it would be within 2 months, but I don’t know. I will work out some monthly plan. I won’t die…hopefully. I know they won’t die. But I don’t want to get more than 3 months behind.

I have shit to do. That should be my new motto. I’m ignoring (starting right now) certain people on social media. That sounds silly, but these people aren’t my friends. We don’t have any other connections. Oh, there is one person in real life getting on my nerves. I wish I could ignore her. Haha. Not possible.

We were never friends. I know that. She definitely knows that. I’m not good enough for her because I have no money. Okay, that was totally WRONG and snarky. I’m not a Libra, no need to act like that. I hope she isn’t vindictive like a Scorpio. I couldn’t take that.

I think Scorpios get a bad rap. Once they do the work on their past hurts, they can be awesome healers. I like their intensity. However, an unhealed Scorpio can be scary.

I needed to vent and rant. Lovely blog. I love my blog. Okay, that’s sarcasm. I love Gabby Berstein and my dog. Marie Forleo is okay too. 😉 I want to say Marie is my business role model, but I keep thinking I’m not like her. She’s an extrovert. She helps people start businesses. She can talk. etc.

Election 2020: I’m kind of sad that Beto dropped out of the race. I didn’t like that he called Elizabeth Warren ‘punitive’. He is too moderate for me, but I liked him on the debate stage. So freaking bummed that Castro won’t be on the debate stage on November 20th. And then there is Bloomberg. Whatever. Next.

This week I…

Music of the week: Miranda Lambert, Natasha Bedingfield, H.E.R, Ariana Grande, Lauren Daigle, Alessia Cara, Backstreet Boys, Beyonce

TV of the week:  Survivor, The Devil Next Door

Podcasts of the week: So You Wanna Be a Witch, Crimelines

Books of the week: I’m rereading  Everything is Figureoutable by Marie Forleo. I’m also rereading Super Attractor: Manifesting a Life Beyond Your Wildest Dreams by Gabby Bernstein. At first, I wasn’t crazy about Super Attractor. Now I can’t get enough. I’ve probably read it three times. I will probably read it 10 more times before the year is over. Who needs new books?

I need to finish Letting Go by David Hawkins. It’s about surrendering negative feelings. Think I need to do that. 😉

Weekend Plans: My therapist is nuts. She wants me to walk my dog twice a day for an hour. I don’t do the cold. I don’t leave my house when it’s cold. I hibernate. But you know what? I’m going to do it. I will walk him right after lunch and right after work. Did I mention that I hate the cold? I sort of hoping it rains on some days just so I have an excuse not to walk.

Tomorrow I’m taking my dog to the park in the morning. I’m really doing it because I want to get my mind off doing the video tarot reading. If I stayed in, I would probably drive myself crazy.

I hope I can get of my mind, tune in and give a good tarot reading tomorrow.

Not hitting the mute button

COUNTDOWN: 10 days until my beach vacay. 🙂

I signed up for 4 weeks of Hello Fresh. I get my first two meals on Tuesday. Two meals is enough food for 4 people. So really it’s four meals for me. It’s not the most cost-effective thing, but I do get $20 off for the first 4 weeks, and then I’m canceling. I’m going to eat on $4 a day after I’m done with this meal delivery service, there’s NO WAY I’m going to spend full price on Hello Fresh. That’s out of my comfort zone. I can eat a baked potato and salad for less than $3. That’s more in my price range. I hate wasting money on food.

Too bad a lot of the meals I wanted are spicy. I can’t do spicy, so I ended up picking meatloaf, tilapia, chicken, and burgers for my first two weeks. Well, I will be on vacation for the second week so I will be skipping one week. I’m glad that’s allowed. Anyway, this will get me cooking. Most of the meals seem doable for a beginner, BUT I might have to buy supplies. I don’t cook so I don’t have shit! I have a small pan for scrambled eggs and a microwave. 🙂

I have a simple meal plan for after Nutrisystem. Here goes:

  • Breakfast: Biscotti and scrambled eggs
  • Lunch: Bar and yogurt or small turkey burger and yogut or a big yogurt parfait
  • Dinner: medium baked potato with a salad, tacos with a salad

I need more dinner options. I will probably end up eating a baked potato (carbs…ugh!) on most days. Tacos will probably happen once or twice a week. My favorite foods are tacos, pasta, and eggs. 🙂 I would love to be able to make pasta, but I know I would eat it too much, so I will probably never learn to make it. Back to dinner options – I will probably add fish (salmon and tilapia) and chicken eventually.

Yoga. Not great. I like the studio and the teacher. However, the teacher did not do the poses. I HATE THAT. She called out all the poses. Even if I knew all the poses, it was sometimes hard to hear her over the music. I’d heard of about 60% of the poses, but I haven’t done ‘hardcore’ yoga in about 7 years. I’m so glad I didn’t buy a pass. So glad. I’m not going back. Before I go to another yoga studio, maybe I should call and ask whether the teacher does the poses. ???

For now, I’m going to do yoga outside in the backyard. All the yoga studios are downtown and ugh, parking. Plus, I don’t want to pay $20 to $25 for a walk-in class. So I’ll just do it free outside until I want to challenge myself. It’ll be exciting to try to learn all the poses. Maybe that will be a goal for this summer.

Therapy. She told me to stop watching the news! LOL. What?? Okay, I have cut down on my news watching by about 60%. I’m a news junkie, so I feel a little out of sorts. As in, WTF is going on? I’m still keeping up with election 2020. That is the only thing I really care about anyway. She also told me not to watch reality TV because it feeds the idea that people are evil. ROFL. Uh, it’s reality. Duh. Too freaking funny. I haven’t watched reality TV at all this week, but I am right now. Haha.

She also was the one that gave me the debt advice. :/ I’m still bummed about that. See last entry. One correction: I said that I never missed paying a bill, but I did foreclose on my house about 9 or 10 years ago. However, I got a shitty loan that Becky wouldn’t have gotten. Becky is someone with money, btw. I think the loan I got is illegal now or they should be so I don’t feel bad at all about that. Not sorry.

I do feel a little bit better about what I’m doing because it is necessary for me to get to the next level. I have to stop using credit cards. I pulled The Star (from tarot) on how to deal with this first month or creditors calling me, getting emails, and maybe being threatned with lawsuits (kill me now). The Star is about self healing. I’ll just quote what Biddy Tarot says on this card:

As the Star follows the Tower card in the Tarot, it comes as a welcome reprieve after a period of destruction and turmoil. You have endured many challenges and stripped yourself bare of any limiting beliefs that have previously held you back. You are realising your core essence, who you are beneath all the layers. No matter what life throws your way, you know that you are always connected to the Divine and pure loving energy. You hold a new sense of self, a new appreciation for the core of your Being.


The Star brings renewed hope and faith, and a sense that you are truly blessed by the Universe. You are entering a peaceful, loving phase in your life, filled with calm energy, mental stability and more in-depth understanding of both yourself and others around you. This is a time of significant personal growth and development as you are now ready to receive the many blessings of the Universe.

biddy tarot.com

This is the best card I could have pulled! I felt hopeful after pulling that. I don’t always trust tarot which is something a tarot reader never says, but recently I’ve learned that tarot is fucking magical. I believe it it now more than I ever have. But I still don’t want to read full-time. I want to do astrology.

So yeah, therapy is going okay. I’m still getting charged full price, BUT they refund me the money about 3 weeks later. Sigh. Even though I’m doing overtime, my finances aren’t great, so I’m worried about always being charged full price. What if I don’t have $80 in the bank at that time? (I would have the copay of $25 in the bank or I would cancel the appointment). I’m in the process of switching banks for the first time ever! So I have to switch everything over ASAP. Double sigh. I will have to withdraw all the money from the ATM because I’m not going inside the bank. I will have a bunch of $20 bills to take to the new bank. It might be about $900!! That’s not suspicious at all. LOL. They wouldn’t let me transfer all my money online. They only allowed $350. Not sure why.

Not much to say about election 2020. I said I didn’t mind a big crowd of people running, but now I believe this is the end of Marianne Williamson. 😦 MSNBC and CNN won’t have more than 20 people on the debate stage. So Marianne can’t make it because she has to be at 1% in three polls due to about 25 people running. This sucks. When people poll the people over the phone, they don’t even mention Marianne. Dammit. Reality sucks.

Biden, Warren, Harris, Sanders, and Buttigieg are currently in the lead. Sorry, that’s not in order. Warren is the only one not beating Trump. She’s at 47%. He gets 48%. But this is too early and doesn’t really matter. People thought Obama wasn’t electable and I think he was president. Not sure. Anyway, MSNBC is loving on Buttigieg a little too much. I like him also, but geez. Beto is finally doing cable news. He must have read my post about him. 😉 Oh, and DeBlasio will probably run. Great. I used to really like him. Now he’s so-so like Corey Booker. He’s not as horrible as Biden. But not ideal.

This week I…

Music of the week: Beyonce, Mariah Carey, Victory, Sara Bareilles, Lissie, Jannelle Monae, Maggie Rogers, Marren Morris

TV of the week:  NBA Playoffs, How to Get Away With Murder

Podcasts of the week: All In with Chris Hayes, Pod Save America, Tarot for the Wild Soul, The Astrology Podcast, The Jim Fortin Podcast, True Crime Garage

Books of the week: Now reading – 

Weekend Plans: Working overtime. I’m exhausted, but I’m loving the extra money, so I can’t complain. I’m going grocery shopping. I will probably buy a few supplies for the Hello Fresh meals. I don’t think I need much. I can just use my mom’s stuff. I prefer to have my own, and I used to, but over many moves, I’ve lost almost all my kitchen stuff.

What else? I have to pack for my beach trip. Not a big deal. Most of my stuff is packed, but I never unpacked from Los Angeles, so everything is mixed up. I have a lot of school work to do. I’m trying to figure out what I want to take with me to the beach as far as stuff to do. I didn’t want to do work, but I probably will do school work. I wanted to just read for fun, but that probably won’t happen. I just want to relax. At least, I don’t have to do real work.

Thanks for reading! Have a great weekend. 🙂

The clouds are still here

COUNTDOWN: 19 days until my beach birthday vacation 🙂

I like the large print on this site, but I wonder how it looks on phones. I still can’t believe people go to websites on their phones! I only do it if I have no choice. But I know from my tarot site that people do visit on mobile browsers. Anyway, I wanted something basic, and purple is my favorite color, so here we go. I hate the red on this site, but I don’t know how to get rid of it. Have I mentioned that this blog is now at anotherparade.com? 🙂 But feel free to keep visiting the old address. Same site at both addresses.

I’m all for college being free and all. BUT I went to a community college for two years on scholarship and then went to a cheaper university for 3 years to lower my costs. (If I hadn’t changed my major, I would have only done 2 years at the university). If someone CHOOSES to go to a high priced college… WTF? Do you know how much better my life could be if I had gone to a more expensive school? I really wanted to go. I got accepted to the school. I could have gone. But I was smart enough to know I didn’t want school loans forever. C’mon people!! People act like they are entitled to go to any school they want and have no side effects. Ten years from now, college might be a right, but the last time I checked America doesn’t do it that way.

In the future, when college may be free, some people may not be able to go very far for school. Where are they going to live? I had a loan for that, and I went without food during the last days because my loans and financial aid ran out. I mean, I ate something once a day, but I couldn’t eat any of the cafeteria food that I really loved.

No one ever taught me about finances, but I could figure out going to an expensive college wasn’t smart. I knew that at 10 years old when I was thinking of becoming a veterinarian. Is all this fair? OF COURSE NOT. People without money always get screwed. It’s the American way.

And on a different topic, I guess people in prison should be allowed to vote. Maine and Vermont already allow it so why not do it for everyone else?

I have my second therapy appointment in about an hour. OH! The insurance company said I should only have to pay the copay. That’s great news, right? However, I also got TWO letters saying the service is not covered. So which is correct? SIGH!!! I still don’t know whether therapy is covered, but I did look at the benefit book, and it says video/online treatment is covered as long as I use the right company to pick a therapist from and of course I did. Besides, I don’t know of other companies that offer REAL online therapy. Meaning Talkspace and companies like that. I’ve read horror stories about how bad the therapy is on those sites.

In conclusion, I still have no idea whether this therapy is covered.

Election 2020: Buttigieg appears to be more moderate than I like. Damn. But I have high standards. It’s also very convenient that people are trying to say he’s racist. Yes, the white GAY man must be racist, and that’s why you don’t like him. 😉 I have no idea why the black police chief (sergeant or whoever) had to leave his job. Really odd. I’m curious, and I want facts.

Btw, a lot of people are racist. I’m sure some of the Dems running for president are racist. I just accept that as a given. I know some are annoyed by “identity politics.” Sanders admitted it about 6 months ago. Now he knows better than to say that shit out loud. I bet Biden is SICK of hearing about women and the crime bill and Anita Hill and blah, blah, blah. I bet he is so over it, but I have no proof.

At least Beto apologized for being white. ROFL. I’m joking. Well, Beto and others have sort of apologized for being white males. White people don’t need to go around being ashamed to be white (not that many even think about being white). I don’t mean to give anyone a pass, but is it Biden’s, Buttigieg’s, or Sanders’ fault that they are getting more media coverage than most of the women? I think it’s a HUGE mistake for Beto not to give press to cable news. He’ll learn the hard way. You can’t run for president as you ran for the Senate. Oh, and I loved how Sanders was groaned at by women of color when he mentioned marching with MLK Jr. I’m so glad I’m not the only one sick of that story. I’ve seen the pictures. I know the story. Um, good for him?

One more thing – Marianne Williamson has raised 1.2 million dollars! That is more than some of the men already in DC!! But she still doesn’t have enough people donating to be in the debate. I think she’ll get there. She has the money, but not enough supporters.

Wait…another thing. Some people are pissed that Biden used Charlottesville in his announcement. Especially people in Virginia. Sigh. When I heard rumors he was going to be talking about Charlottesville, I knew that that was going to be a mistake. I didn’t know that was going to be the whole freaking announcement! Only the Biden lovers were so in love with that announcement. A person in the media said it made her cry. Oh please! Don’t exploit Charlottesville. This is how people get called ‘out of touch,’ but whatever. Carry on.

In case, you’re new here, I usually do one LONG post a week. I used to blog about 3-4 times a week, but due to work, online classes and trying to start a business I can’t post that often so I always post here once a week.

This week I…

Music of the week: Beyonce, Jess Glynne, Jussie Smollett, Matt Nathanson, Tori Kelly, Ariana Grande, Sara Bareilles, Taylor Swift

I thought Taylor Swift was releasing an album. All this hype for a single? 😦 Okay, I’ll wait for the album. Her albums are hit or miss, so I know not to be too excited.

TV of the week:  NBA Playoffs, How to Get Away With Murder

Podcasts of the week: True Crime Garage, So You Wanna Be a Witch, Pod Save America, The Lowe Post, The Water Trio, Living Open

Books of the week: Now reading – 

Weekend Plans: Uh, a lot. Working overtime on Saturday. My dog’s birthday is on Sunday, so we’re going to the park. I want to take my astrology test, but that’s not required. I have to take notes on another astrology class I’m taking. I want to get back into yoga desperately, so I’m going to do it in the backyard because it’s hard to find a class that fits my schedule. I wanted to blog more about yoga, but this post is so long!

I have to clean up and move things around because I had to buy a portable AC. $$$ It’s been 95 degrees in here, but only 85 outside. I kid you not! So I had to do something. I hope to get it installed by Monday or Tuesday.

I have therapy in 20 minutes. LOL. Instead of focusing on that, I’m doing this blog post. Anyway, thanks so much for reading. Have a great weekend! 🙂

The noise got too loud

OMG. I almost forgot to blog here this week. This week has been crazy. I have 3 tarot classes upcoming. Well, one already started. Two start on March 15th. I’m going to put one of the classes I was most excited about on the back burner. It’s a prerecorded class, so it’s not a big deal. I’m so tired right now. Why am I blogging? Sorry.

I can’t get comfortable. My dog is in my way on the bed. Grrr! Only 9 weeks until my birthday vacay! woohoo! No work. No school. A real break!! Oh, I’m also taking an astrology course that starts April 25th. I’m only taking it because I’ll get a certificate from the School of London. That’s not the real name of the school. I just know the professor teaches in London. Anyway, I won’t be doing any school work during my break.

I think I’m giving up on my “business”…for now. I’m still going to post on Instagram at least 4 days a week. I will probably do two free tarot readings a month unless I’m swamped with school. I’m not sure. I believe practice is important, so I don’t want to just completely stop doing readings. I’ve only had one sale. One sale.

I’ve invested way too much into this “business”. Fuck that shit! I’m not going to apologize for this outburst. No more money. No more classes. I have enough classes to last me for TWO+ years. I don’t need anymore. I have enough tarot, astrology, and business resources. I’m done. So done.

Oh, money. I borrowed $2,000 from my 401K. I should have borrowed more. The good thing about borrowing from my 401K is that all the low interest goes back to me. That is MY MONEY. Well, half of it is mine. I want it all, but my job won’t let me borrow it. I could borrow it for a downpayment on a house. But I’m 4-5 years from buying a house.

The $2000 is gone, btw. I paid my bills with it. Moving was so expensive! I’ve moved about 5 times since I’ve been an adult. It has never cost me a lot…until now. I had no idea I would be so worried about ‘checks’ bouncing as of Wednesday. I was so scared and so thankful that my loan came just in time. Thank the universe.

This week I…

Music of the week: Rachel Platten, Ariana Grande, Jewel, Maggie Rogers, India.Arie, Solange, Christina Aguilera, Lake Street Drive

TV of the week: Survivor, basketball

Podcasts of the week: True Crime Garage, So You Wanna Be a Witch, All In With Chris Hayes, Over it and On With It, rise up! good witch podcast, Tara Brach, Tarot for the Wild Soul, The Lowe Post, Your Own Magic

Books of the week: Now reading – 

Weekend Plans: I went to the library for two hours today. I booked a study room. I went to the county library this time. There was a big screen TV. They have wi-fi. I normally don’t need internet while studying but I made the stupid decision to put ALL my documents in the cloud the night before. Anyway, I got a ton accomplished. I’m back on track. I’m definitely going to book there again. The only downside is the noise. I can hear everyone else and they can hear me. No soundproofing. I just put my headphones on and listened to Spotify with the volume really low.

Tomorrow is supposed to be 70 degrees. If it doesn’t rain, I’m going on a walk with my dog. I have astrology class at 2:30. I really want to plan my whole week hour by hour every Sunday. But things keep changing. Am I doing tarot or not? If I’m not, I can take a break for a few days while I think about it. Sigh. I usually work on SWT (my biz name) for at least 2-3 hours every weekday. I think I’m thinking about Monday off.

So tired. It’s 11:21 PM. I had a decent day until I realized that my business probably won’t suceed because I won’t do events. $%@$

I’m over thinking about it. Should I even start my Patreon? Good question. What’s the point? I think I can figure out a way only to spend 20 hours a week on tarot/astrology and just keep putting content out there. I don’t mind if I don’t make money, but I can’t invest anymore. That’s for sure!

I’ve rambled enough. I know there are probably a ton of mistakes in this. Too tired. Have a great rest of the weekend and good week! Thanks for reading. 🙂 I’m going to bed.