Fake asses

These FABs (fake ass bitches) are going to make me start quoting JoJo. LOL. Let me preface this by saying D didn’t understand what I was saying. I can’t help anyone who doesn’t know the backstory. So this might not make sense since I’m not getting into the backstory.

This is about those on the right that insist there is a “war on Christmas” STFU! Get a real problem and stop looking for shit. I usually don’t run into these people but once a year I meet one.

And today was the day. Sigh. The cashier said “Merry Christmas” to the customer in front of her. No problem. I barely noticed. Then Miss ‘I voted for Trump’ (hahaha) said, “Thanks for saying that.” As in thanks for saying Christmas instead of happy holidays. I half rolled my eyes, but I caught myself. I forgot that I wasn’t in my living room.

Merry Fucking Christmas to ALL. Okay, I said it. I don’t have a problem when people say it to me. I don’t know anyone who has a problem with people saying it…even people who don’t celebrate usually tolerate it. Right? The only people who think people have a problem are the war on Xmas people.

It is a false narrative fed by Fox News, and I can’t stand that ignorant bullshit. There isn’t a war on your holiday. Celebrate any way you want. And how do I think you are going to celebrate? By giving your grandkids iPhones (or whatever the big gift is this year – I wouldn’t know). What does that have to do with Christ? Huh? What?

And you are probably hoping for that jewelry from your husband. What exactly does that have to do with Christ? Break it down for me.

Stop acting like it is a purely Christian holiday. Are these people even Christian??! LOL. Don’t even get me started on what’s in the Bible and how people act. I’ve read the whole Bible. I know what’s in it.

Stop with your fake outrage over Xmas. I will take the Christ out of it because I know it gets on people’s nerves. I can be petty. No shit. Maybe these people need to take a look into the mirror if they want to see who took Christ out of Christmas.

Back to this women. Then she started talking about a “new era” and how things are starting to get better. I almost took my groceries and got into another line at that point. BUT she said it was because she had a new job. hahaha haha hahaha. Who believes that? She was so talking about Trump. I’m willing to bet everything I have on it. (I don’t have much). She looked old enough to be retired. She said she had been working at her job for 26 years. Whatever.

Enough about her and the fake war. Let’s talk about the cashier and ME. 😉 The first thing he said was “English?”. LOL. No one believes I’m American. I’ve been getting that all my life. I told him I was from Maryland. He asked how did I like it here and then he said he was from Egypt. I asked how he liked it here. That was the extent of our convo. He also said Merry Christmas, of course. heh. I said, “thanks” or “thanks and you too.”

When I was in Mexico, this guy started talking to me really fast in Spanish. I was like WOAH. Slow down. I can barely speak it. People think I’m from the most random places. They are shocked when I say I’m from America or Maryland.  But it’s true. 🙂

I found my dream house! There are three problems. There is a neighbor on one side (a little too close), the yard isn’t huge and it is priced at $149,000. 😦 I can’t afford the down payment for that since I’m not a first time homeowner.  It is a little over 1 hour from where I live now. If I had the money, I would 100% go after this house. Forget the neighbor. There is a fence on that side of the house (and only on that side).

It has 3 bedrooms and two baths. It is 1,300 square feet which is a little big for me. I would rather have land than a big house. I don’t need space inside. I want space outside! Here are two pics of the house:




shake me from stuff hallucinations

I get a few days off and I become a posting machine. I can’t remember the last time I’ve done this many entries back to back. Anyway, here is a newsflash: I AM NOT A MINIMALIST. Sigh.  I’m just trying to get back to where I was 5 years ago. I didn’t buy stuff just to buy stuff. I put my money in savings. Now I really, really, really need to put money in savings and I’m still spending too much.

Bleh. Perhaps looking at my dream house will help? Maybe I need to look at a pic of it every day. My dream house isn’t extravagant. It is attainable. I have good credit.  I just have to save for a downpayment of $25,000 or less. The house I was just looking at is on 6 acres (privacy!) and I would “only” need to put $18,000 down. 3 bedrooms and 2 full baths. 1,040 sqft. Yeah, it is a little big for me, but I care more about the acres than the number of bedrooms. That should be motivation enough. Maybe it is??? I need to think about this house or any house every single day.

Like I previously posted, I bought a new purse and clothes from Forever 21. That isn’t all. My dry cleaning was $60. I had no idea it would be that high. Those were my designer clothes I was dry cleaning just in case. WTF? That isn’t all. I bought a new planner:

my new planner
my new planner

Before you judge, I’ve been using my Plum Paper Planner for 8 whole months. lol. That is a long time in planner world. This one cost me $14 at Hobby Lobby with a 40% off coupon. So not too bad. But did I need it? NO. It is a planner from Me And My Big Ideas: The Happy Planner. I decided to buy it because I was kind of getting tired of using the PPP. It is an 18-month planner. If I like it, I plan to use it until at least June 2016.

I’m a Filofax/Kikki.K girl so this will take some getting used to. I swore off coiled or disc bound planners. There aren’t any folders in the planner. Where do I put my stuff? haha. (I know some can be purchased…). I did purchase extra note pages because a planner ain’t a planner without note pages. It will take a while to see if I like it.

Here is a walk through of the planner. I also have some of the accessories she has (the extra covers, note pages and stickers).

This is my confession. I suck at money. This is sort of a new struggle for me. I did put some money in savings but geez. I have to see that buying stuff is useless and won’t get me near my goals of travel and a house in the middle of nowhere. I know becoming a minimalist takes time for most people. I did declutter (not completely yet). I will give myself some credit. I don’t have a huge problem throwing stuff away and donating stuff.

New Rules

  • No more clothes/purses/shoes through May 2016.
  • No more planner related items through January 2016 (so, so, so hard).
  • Keep grocery bill under $115 every 3 weeks.
  • No credit card use.
  • Declutter until I’m done weekly. Fill donation bags and trash can every week.

I should probably add stop watching non-minimalists on YouTube. But I’m thinking I can watch YouTubers I’m subscribed to and not get caught up. I feel like I should be able to. And no, YouTubers aren’t to blame. Our society encourages people to buy. Being a minimalist is against everything we are taught in the Western world. MORE MORE MORE. You don’t want MORE? What is wrong with you? Are you settling? Uh, no. I just don’t desire the same things as everyone else. #DifferentDefintionsOfLiving

Besides most of  the people on YouTube make twice what I make or the younger ones have well-off parents.  They can afford to spend what they spend. I’m not in their boat.


I now weigh 123! I stopped Nutrisystem, have cheat days and I lose weight. Interesting. My next cheat days are going to be the two days of Thanksgiving. I have never sat for a Thanksgiving dinner. Ever. Thank Buddha. But sometimes my mom will cook and I take the food home. So I’m going all out for those two days. Cake, pizza, cornish hen, stuffing, bread etc. That’s the plan. TWO cheat days next month. YAY. 🙂 But until then I will be on my 1,200 – 1,500 calorie “diet”.

When I went to my health screening, the nurse told me if I lose any more weight, I will be underweight. I’m not concerned about that. I was chronically underweight 5-6 years ago. I don’t think that will happen again. I’m otherwise healthy. However, I wish my blood pressure were lower. It isn’t too high, but I could see it going there. She saw how nervous I was and thought it might be due to that. But nah, my BP has been that way for about 6 months.

A cause for celebration



I can’t remember the last time I felt such pure joy. I’m going to be working from home. SOON. Soon as in two weeks or less!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Sorry. I actually smiled at my desk for the first time in a long time. Then I went into the bathroom and jumped up and down. 🙂 What happened today? After all, I already said I was going to be working from home. I got some equipment today. Not my computer or printer. Something awesome. I really can’t say because it is a unique thing for our company. I am guarding that thing more than my life. I can’t believe this…………..any of this.

Total yayness!!

There are concerns. And I know life won’t be awesome (LOL) just because I’m working from home. I’m not that naive. But the work related concerns have to do with the internet. My router is downstairs. I’m working upstairs, far away from the router. Will I have to call the ISP to install anything? Will that hold up things up? Sigh. These are things I don’t know. And I don’t know how I am supposed to know them until I get all the equipment. By then it will be too late. And I could end up going home and then having to spend a day or two working AT work. (The horror!)

Oh well. Now I have to clean my house – never ending process – and my desk/office area. The office area is nothing compared to my house. I really have to buckle down and clean it. Otherwise how will I ever sell it? Sigh. Double sigh. %^#$

I’ve been rethinking the whole buying a townhouse thing. I know I can’t stand noise. It literally drives me crazy. NO it isn’t that I don’t like noise. I’m neurotic about it. Plus I happen to like my privacy. So why am I considering a townhouse? Of course there are benefits to a townhouse. I could get a really nice looking place with new appliances for a good price. Plus I wouldn’t have to worry about snow in the parking lot. Not that we have had any snow this year. It was 70 degrees yesterday.

I’m seriously thinking about moving to the country. That is my dream. HOWEVER, it is insane. I’m not going to be working at this company forever. What if I have to get a job in the city? How much gas will that be? What if all my money goes there? Plus there is car maintenance. Another drawback is the weather and I’m not talking just snow. What about the hurricanes? When they lose power, sometimes they don’t get it back for weeks. Once it was MONTHS. The biggest issue is really the job/driving into the city thing.

But wouldn’t it be great?? I could get 2-5 acres of land and a tiny house (heh) for the price of a nice townhouse. NO NEIGHBORS. My own driveway. The life. But how can I ever justify the job thing??? I’m really concerned with being stuck an hour away from the city. I already made one buying a house mistake. I can’t make another. And how patient are employers going to be when I say, “We still have snow out here. No plows have come and I live on a hill“. My current employer wouldn’t give a damn. I would be out of a job. In the city, you know that eventually the roads will be cleared.

The conclusion might be to try to find a private space in the city. But that won’t be easy. And I know from previous experience that a realtor won’t want to spend weeks or months looking for the perfect private house since I won’t be spending a lot of money. They want commission and I’m not giving them much.

I’ve been ruminating over this, probably too much. I was so sure about the townhouse but now I’m starting to question everything. How could I possibly think I could live there. Should I give it a chance? See, the questions never stop. When it isn’t social anxiety, it is anxiety about cleaning my house and where will I move?

Here is a house I’ve been obsessing over. It was built in 1999. 3 bedrooms and 2 baths. It is perfect for me because I love nature. I would have my own creek!!! And lake. It is within my budget. The house is small compared to all the land that comes with it. House is 1400 sq feet (big for me!) and 2.5 acres of land.

view of lake from patio
my very own creek?

I think carpel tunnel syndrome is settli…

I think carpel tunnel syndrome is settling in….or whatever it does. wah! Both arms. 😦


But in San Miguel…I felt a kind of peace come over me. I have felt this elsewhere – in Tibet and Machu Picchi – but those were special places, holy places. This was just a dusty old place, but for me it had become everything. I was simply enjoying the experience of being, of living without goal or expectation, without longing or desire. I was happy when I was there – happy just to be.

-Mary Morris

I worked overtime today. I’m so tired. I don’t think complete sentences are doable at the moment. I’ll try a little. I’ve been surfing the net and I found a bunch of ex-pat blogs. (North Americans now living in Mexico for whatever reason). I don’t think I should be reading these blogs. These people can like totally TALK and shit. And then there’s me.

You know? Or maybe you don’t. Here is an absolute delish blog: Gringa-N-Mexico. Funny w/cute baby pics. (No I don’t hate kids!)

I can barely make it here…does that mean moving to Mexico is a better idea? Or am I nuts? (rhetorical question, thank you). Do I just stay in the US because that is where I was born? I would love dual citizenship.

I should just post pictures.

Pic of my dream house master bedroom

master bedroom

The above pic is from a house in Guatemala. I can’t remember the price since I’ve browsed all price ranges. That house is a beauty. I’m not sure why the floor looks like that. In the living room pictures the floor looks lovely. (shiny, hardwood etc).

Here is a pic from a Costa Rica house. I’m so simple that I would love for my living room to look like this:
living room

Ecuador had the best houses for the best prices. I would love to visit there but I don’t know a thing about living there. I haven’t found my perfect Mexican casa yet. Everything nice and affordable is in Baja California (or whatevs) and that isn’t the area I want.

Enough of this.

re: my last entry

Friday was a good day. good not great. it was probably helpful that the ‘she’s getting fired’ person was only there for half a day and the other department wasn’t there.

i was actually at peace and not irritable. my goal is to be like that everyday. hard work.

here is a pic of my dream house
i’ve had this vision for about 6 months. i finally found a photo. it’s perfect except for the steps.

and my dream backyard: