My therapist hates elephants

I read the El Paso’s shooter’s supposed manifesto. It was kind of short. And he doesn’t seem more mentally ill than the average murderer. But I will withhold judgement until we get a background on the shooter.  Um, I agree with some of what he said. Okay, only 5%. Most jobs will be automated. That’s a fact unless some magic law occurs (it will not). Sad, but true. My current job won’t exist in 10 years. I’m surprised it still exists now. It sucks. The answer seems to become an entrepreneur. These people seem to not realize that not everyone is made for that. Plus, some businesses need capital, and if you don’t have a trust fund, how do you get started?

I started something online because that was the only option for me.  I’ve made about $50 in 2019. But I’m not giving up, but if I had a brick and mortar store, I would have to give up due to costs. Anyway, some of his manifesto I don’t understand. It seems to be a racist thing.

I don’t understand what automated jobs and being anti-pollution have to do with killing immigrants, though. I’m clueless. I guess he just put that in there to explain his frustration. And I’m sure he didn’t only kill/injure immigrants. What a waste of life. He’ll probably be killed by Texas. He is also anti-war. I think. I refuse to try to figure out everything he said. But I’m anti-war too. Then he calls Americans hypocrites. Um…… yes, Americans are extremely hypocritical when it comes to many things, but you just killed 20+ people so???? Yeah, I’m anti-war, but I’ll kill a bunch of innocent people for no reason. Pathetic.

Kind of hard to move on from that…

My therapist hates elephants, so I don’t know if I should see her again. Okay, she didn’t say she hated elephants, but she told me she didn’t think it was a good idea to adopt one. LOL. It’s not going to live with me in my 95-degree room. I have a dog! Whatever. I will probably wait until September/October to adopt the elephant IF I’m good and don’t waste money on crap. It’ll be a reward. I’ve always hated the idea of rewarding myself by buying stuff. But since I’ve been off Abilify, I’ve been good with not buying stuff. Am I cured? Probably not.

A lot of stuff going on with therapy and doctors right now. It’s so much to unpack. I don’t feel like getting into now. I still can’t eat when I first wake up. I now get up later around 5:30 AM and then I eat at 7:30 only because I can’t drink coffee on an empty stomach. I’m so tired due to the meds. SO Tired. I can barely work. But I have to. The quickest work is there between 6 AM and 7:30. If you come in at 8, good luck making the goal. So I work in 30-minute spurts and then sleep while sitting up for about 3 minutes at a time. I’m not kidding.

I’m drinking a lot of caffeine these days. I still weigh 132, so I’m not losing any more weight. I lost 4 pounds when I first got off Abilify. Now I’m stable…for now.

Election 2020: The next debate in September will only have 10 people. One night. Good for the public. But it’s the same for the candidates. They will still only have one minute to respond. That’s frustrating. Like most people, I hate the constant cutting off the candidates.

Kamala was exposed for the liar she is. Finally. She won’t be the nominee. Okay, I felt bad for her at times during the debate. But her debate performance is how she is during town halls. She can’t answer 50% of the questions with a straight forward answer because she has to lie. EXPOSED.

I want a Warren/Castro ticket, but that will never happen. Castro isn’t polling high enough to be taken seriously. HOWEVER, he is from Texas. Could he help the Dem candidate win Texas?? Probably not. I just really like Castro’s policies, so I want him on the ticket.

I could say more. I live-tweeted some of the debate, so my thoughts are on the sidebar.  I have to get back to working on creating my astrology course. I’m working on module 4 out of 5 modules.

This week I…

Music of the week: Taylor Swift, Beyonce, Camila Cabello, Ariana Grande, Rachael Sage, Carly Rae Jepsen, Tori Kelly, Alessia Cara

TV of the week: Big Brother, Grey’s Anatomy

I’m thinking about watching The Bachelorette now that it is over. But it would take forever. I think each episode is 2 hours??! I watch TV in spurts so that would take me at least 6 weeks to watch. Not sure it’s worth the time, but nothing is on besides Big Brother.

Podcasts of the week: True Crime Garage, Generation Why, White Lies, A Course in Miracles Radio, Pod Save America, Crime Junkie, Tarot for the Wild Soul, The 11th Hour, AM Joy

Books of the week: Now reading:

I’m working on my course, so I’m knee-deep in about 5 astrology books right now.

Weekend Plans: No overtime this weekend. 😦 But I still worked a little, so I wouldn’t be behind next week. I hope I get to work overtime next week, but my manager is on vacation so I who knows? Right now I’m installing Windows 10 on my work computer. I’m so nervous that it won’t work by Monday and I’ll have to go to work in the office. It is taking more than the 4 hours I was quoted. I’m really nervous I will lose documents I need to do my work. Oh well.

My astrology class was canceled. So no sitting in front of a computer for 3 hours tomorrow. I will work on creating my course. In fact, I must get back to that now.

Thanks for reading. Have an excellent weekend! 🙂

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