This brokenness inside me might start healing

I’ve been crying. Weeping. It all started when I learned of Stuart Scott’s passing. I was taking an online test when the news broke so I didn’t know until I got on Twitter. I can’t stop crying. And I don’t know why. Yeah, I used to fall asleep to him, Letterman or cable news every night. It depended on what was going on. But I never considered myself a huge fan. He is SportsCenter to me. Ever since I’ve been watching, he’s been there. I don’t know anything else.

I was devastated to learn he had a rare form of cancer. I’d be happy to see him on ESPN. That meant he was doing somewhat okay, right? I’m so sad he passed. I guess I’m heartbroken over the unfairness of it all. He was the best dad, a great friend and mentor. He fought so hard against this cancer. He didn’t give up. He’s an inspiration to me. RIP.

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I’m awaiting my 2015 planner. I tried Evernote and other apps but I don’t like using them so I’m going back to my old ways. Paper and pen. I don’t use my planners as a to do list that often. I use it more as a what I did that day. I can’t wait to get it…I usually just pick up something from the drugstore or WalMart. I’m not that picky when it comes to planners but this year I decided to try something different. I decided to go with Danielle LaPorte’s Desire Map Planner. The 2015 version is sold out but they are selling planners where you can fill in the date (link above).

Some people really get into their planners. Just check out Youtube. I’m glad I’m not the only one. I kind of wish I had gotten a Plum Planner. You can customize them. But usually I can make any planner work. Maybe next year I will get a Plum planner. I think I have to. I keep looking at their website.

Instead of doing Project Life, I will probably just use my planner, paper journal and my computer to document things. I do have enough material to do another Project Life album so I may change my mind. But I don’t think I want to devote time to PL.

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I have 3 days off in May (right before my bday). I’m planning on doing the same thing I did in 2013. I went to the state park and spent 2 days there in a cabin. No TV or internet. Just peace and quiet. Well, I will have some of my music and I’m planning on taking a few DVDs. lol. So days off from work…check! Next is reserving the cabin. I would love to go for 3 nights but that’s $300. So I’m thinking about 2 nights for $200. I’m so scared someone is going to book it before I do. If I had the money, I would book it NOW. I like a particular cabin. I have to have that cabin. It is far away from everyone and everything.

The only thing I don’t like is that I have to bring all my food from home. Last time I drove 20 minutes to a restaurant and that wasn’t a good experience. If I wanted to drive an hour, I could have a lot of options for food but I’d rather stay in.

Dogs are allowed but…ARGH! I would love to take B there one day but I can’t see him being good in the car…or the cabin. It is almost 2 hours away. So I’m  leaning towards boarding him. I just don’t know how he would react to a new place. What if all his house training goes out the window? Can’t have that.

Speaking of my dog, I have to leave him for about 3 hours tomorrow. I’m so worried about what I will come back to.