Set Fire to the Rain

OMG, I want to give up on the regular dose of Abilify….after I told you not to. This sucks. I was on 2.5mg. I had to go without for about 3 days; I ran out of samples. Now I’m on 5mg. That is the normal dose for depression. I’m on my 5th day of 5mg and I’m so freakin exhausted. Not just tired but very sleepy. My muscles are also sore but not as bad as it was on the lower dose. I had gotten used to having energy and now it is gone.

I’m too cynical to say, “I know this is temporary”. I will say I am less than a week away from going back to the low dose. I guess having energy is a good thing? heh. I don’t want to go back to the old me.

Today is my birthday. I have the day off. I went to the one time crochet class. I was the only one there. That was not what I expected. They used to cancel if they only had one person. I think I was on too much medicine to really freak out but I did have butterflies. Forgetting the actual crocheting for a second, the class went okay. I didn’t suck like I normally do socially. (Say yes to drugs?). But by the end, I was getting so sleepy. I wanted to run out of that room….or at least yawn. I was so glad to get out of there! I went home and went straight to bed for a nap.

I may have messed up when I asked her if she knew of any good DVDs for crocheting (she didn’t). I didn’t mean to imply that she wasn’t enough. It is just ONE class. I’m a geek. I need supplements, dude! She got quiet after that; however, it may have been because she wanted to know if I had questions about the project. I am a borderline aspie so I always misunderstand (?) what people say. If you ask me, “do you have any questions” and I don’t have any on that topic, I tend to go to a question I DO HAVE.

The crocheting itself. ugh. That shit is hard. One of my problems is that I learned the simple stuff the wrong way. For years I had no idea I was holding the hook and yarn wrong since the results looked normal. I had a hard time trying to do it the normal way. It would have been better if I’d never touched a crochet hook before.

The hand movements….I suck. I’m not giving up but I’m definitely deflated.

Wowza (say no to drugs?)

I went to a hotel just to get away. The hotel is new, less than 3 years old. The decor was modern (minus the carpet) and I love it. Not to sound nitpicky, but the modern light switches I. do. not. like. I would not have those in my home. I hate them. I took pics of the modern stuff because I loved it so much:

nice art for a hotel
I want the lamp
modern look

My only other complaints had to do with the noise and lack of hot water. I took a warm shower. If someone wants to get away from noise, I probably wouldn’t recommend this hotel. Maybe it is quieter during the week. I don’t know….

What did I get for my birthday?

free breakfast
books
music (Adele, Amos Lee, Burlesque soundtrack)
souvenirs from Trinidad and Tobago
a sandwich maker
a portable DVD player (I have a tendency to break these…or do they just not last? I’m glad I have a DVD player besides the one on my computer though).

I’m going to go “cook” now.

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