Unrequited Love

It’s 1AM, why not blog? Chaz Bono is hot! I’ve thought this for the past couple years but now…WOW. 🙂 I can’t keep it in any longer. Meow! I’m not old enough to remember Chaz as a young girl so I don’t think of him in that way. Of course, I’ve seen tv clips and pictures but that isn’t the same thing.

(I feel like I have to post a pic. This is one of the first ones I found. I’m not going to spend time searching for the best picture – which would be a current pic).

I feel weird admitting this because I’ve read so many derogatory comments about him online. I’m like, “Uh, he is kinda hot….” I don’t care what others say. I find Chaz attractive. And he isn’t brunette. Weird.

Seriously, I’m glad he finally came into himself even if it took 40 years. There is hope for the rest of us. I have no idea how hard it must be to be transgender without the money to get one’s breasts remove etc. That’s a blog topic for when I’m awake.
Last year on my birthday I was in NYC. This year…not so much. My birthday is Monday. Tomorrow (well today – Saturday) I’m going to the library and then I sorta fell in love with this Vegas like hotel and on a whim made a reservation. So right after the trip to the library onto the hotel. Then Sunday I’m coming back to my house. On my birthday I’m going to a chain restaurant to have breakfast with my mom and then I have my crochet class. Afterwards I may go to Victoria Secret to buy myself something with my $10 VS birthday gift card.

What fun! (<—sarcasm) I’m not complaining, just saying this is not a trip to New York. This is sort of like my birthdays before I had a full-time job. It's not a big deal but it just different. I'm going to post my own pics of the suite. But here are pics from the king's suite via the website:

The living room of the suite. What is up with the decor?? Why do hotels do this?

The “bedroom” is a little better.

The suite was cheaper than the doubles room on hotels.com. I got a good deal. I hope I get to use the gym. The hotel only has three machines in the gym! I went to the gym at work once this week. I would like to go twice a week and then maybe up to four times a week eventually.

I’m on the regular dose of abilify: 5mg. I still don’t know the cost since I’m on physician samples for another month. No generic exists since Abilify is relatively new. A generic probably won’t exist for another 4-5 years which really sucks for a lot of people. I read about one person with bipolar who had to stop taking Abilify because her insurance would not pay for a NON-generic for more than 6 months. So here is this person who finds something that works and then she has to quit taking it. 😦

That is just sad. It is hard to find a medicine that works for mental health issues.

I don’t know what I expect to happen on the full dose. I wish it would help me focus more. I’m not doing too bad with my attention span. I spent over an hour making a bracelet. I’m still not done. My brain stopped working so I decided to post a blog. It is almost 2AM. Gotta go. Adios.

2 thoughts on “Unrequited Love

  1. I hesitate to wish you Happy Birthday, because I don’t want to give you too much attention and cause a Bethenny-birthday-like meltdown (which, I too, totally understand)… but it sounds like it was a pleasant occasion. I caught on to your blog while I was checking out places my blog was linked to (Blogs on Depression via WordPress) and have enjoyed a lot of your thoughts on paper. Like Demi Lovato and legions of others, I was teased as a kid and am documenting how singer Tom Jones (I know, most people roll their eyes, but it was him) saved my life in my teens and twenties. It took me years to figure out that I wasn’t just a weird or crazy, but that the singer, who was a sex object and also looked at women as sex objects, became a transitional object that carried me through the most difficult period of my life. And while I was a sad, anxiety-ridden young woman with dark thoughts, I was able to have a “happy ending.” It wasn’t the one I dreamed of — it was far better. Also, as you age, you begin to realize that happy endings come and go with the joys and the challenges of life. Anyway, I am enjoying your blog.

    • Hi! I don’t mind the ‘happy birthday’ at all. Thank you. Music in general has saved me. I sometimes mention Mariah Carey who would probably get a bigger eye roll than Tom Jones. 🙂 Thanks for the compliment. I appreciate it.

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