Never gonna get it

This entry will seem like a broken record. However, it seems like someone from my 3D life has found my blog or it has taken this person weeks to say something clever. (yes I’m being facetious).

I’m not friendly. If friendly means nice to you fine. I used to be nice until I heard what people were saying. They said bad things about me simply because I didn’t talk! I was a loner. An introvert…and shy. When I heard people saying these things I was hurt. Why should they talk about me just because I’m shy? (so naive!) Um, after years of listening to people talk about me and other people I figured out how people operated.

Yeah, I’m not so nice anymore. In fact I’m fed up with most people. I give some a chance but then I find out they are just like “most people”. I’ve grouped them into the group called “social people”.

Why am I always having to explain myself?

JNx: “I’m a social person”.

(What I wanted to say): I’m not so STFU!


I can’t even begin to think how these people think. It’s foreign to me. Everything I’ve figured out is through keeping quiet and studying/analyzing them.

Why am I meditating on them? Well it’s kinda hard not to. They dictate everything. They set the norms. I’m considered weird because of their perceptions. I’m fed up! A little.

I started this entry because I’m so confused on how I’m the bad person when it comes to everything (heh) but specifically house guests. A person who doesn’t mind house guest could not be more different than me. I know these people exist. Google “house guests” and you’ll find being who get OFFENDED if you don’t want them to stay at your place.

Baffling. My place is my only semi-safe place. To have someone demand to stay there is rude, unsympathetic. I go to work where people are constantly around. When I finally get home and close the door, it is nice to finally let loose and be weird me. I’m pretty sure if I were me at work, I would not be there. Trust me. With a person being at my home, I have to continue to be on again. Being on 18/7 is exhausting (for me).

WHY AM I EXPLAINING MYSELF AGAIN? I’m territorial. You invaded my turf. Got it? Probably not.

I was feeling sick on Thursday. Physically & mentally. That morning I decided it was easier to just buy coffee instead of making it. I had the best, filling breakfast burrito and a cappuccino. But turning to food for comfort is bad for so many reasons. Not just because it could turn into a health hazard. I don’t want to spend $4.00 on breakfast. I’m working OT every Saturday to pay for school. I’m not working that much OT (about 16 hours a month which is nothing compared to what the work at home people do. My god, they must be rich….Overtime won’t last forever. The hiring freeze is going away soon. I’m thrilled about that but they still won’t/can’t hire enough people).

I’m so glad we get an extra hour tonight. Yay.

I have to register for classes at work on Monday. I will figure out how many classes I’m taking tomorrow. I’m leaning towards 4 instead of 3 because I want the summer off. I have no idea how much this is going to cost me. I’ve been avoiding it. I’m scared…………….

Tomorrow I will make sure I have all the user names, passwords, class #s so I can register at work. I was supposed to do it from the comfort of my laptop but I’m in training at work and can’t take any time off. :/

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