hate being an earthling

I’m sad but what else is new?

lot of snow for one hour

We are supposed to get a foot of snow. I guess I’m not going to the library tomorrow OR work. I was just going to work a couple hours but oh well. If I don’t have to leave, I’m not. I’m glad I got my dog her xmas gift. But what about my cat? She is really picky and enjoys the toys she has so….I probably won’t get her anything. Bad pet mom.

I got bit in the ass by karma. Bad karma. I totally deserve it for breaking a rule. It isn’t work related (Thank da universe!).

Indulgence in vice… materialistic attractions never propel one towards success in life! Gaining materialistic comforts does not mean gaining success in life. Whatever our position in society today… whatever our material or materialistic accomplishments… at the time of death of body… that which manifests in next manifestation are our virtues… resulting from positive karma!

I shouldn’t care but I don’t understand how anyone can deny karma exists. If people are paying attention, they will see it in their lives everyday. Every time when someone says, “That’s what I get…” Karma! But people like to talk about undeveloped countries and death of “good” people to point out how karma can’t be real. *groan* Tired of that argument. And life on earth is hell. Death is a gift. I’m not going on a karma tangent.

————–
I don’t know about Jupiter, but shy people are the most misunderstood person on Earth. This is what fuels my anger, depression, anxiety etc. How would anyone feel if they are constantly being judged INCORRECTLY? Just because of something you can’t 100% control. (some do get less shy). Hell you would hate people too. Hate is a strong word but I’m highly annoyed by people especially when they are in groups. I know I’m not the only one…I just wish people would TRY to understand. Instead they use that energy to judge.

::exasperated::

30 years old, no relationship, no friends except for co-workers who laugh at me behind my back … There was a time that I tried to make friends and tried hard to fit in but I have stopped caring now.

Even if I had someone beside me I would worry all day that the person doesn’t really like me or put them off by not getting on with them as other girls do. Come to think of it, being alone is so much more comfortable than having to deal with the crap. So you see, there are pros and cons in both sides and I think the side I am in now is better. I really don’t care anymore except maybe on a Friday night

there are others out that. Hate reading those message boards. I feel helpless. 😦

A lot of people throughout my life have pointed out my lack of talking/quietness. I think they are simply bewildered at the thought of me showing no “real” personality. They have been around me for months, perhaps even years, and yet they don’t really know me, and they wonder, “can he really be this lifeless, this dull, and this uninspiring?”

Of course, the point of displaying such a lack of personality is so that it won’t be out there for someone to judge. If there is no real personality, then they can’t judge the real me.

But honestly, it doesn’t even matter if I WANTED to put my personality out there, because my body, mind, and soul have all learned that this is the best way to deal with things. To just shut down and be “lifeless.” Even though I am actually full of life, ideas, opinions, humor, etc. I squish it all down and don’t dare show it to anyone. If I try, then I am fighting what have ingrained into myself.

So I don’t want to be this lifeless drone trying to offend anyone, always being way too weak and unassertive, so I will of course fight it till whenever it is I overcome it or die. What I hope to accomplish is to at least not be defined by this quietness or “lack of personality.”

agree

I have experienced this at work. People say to my face, “Wow. You’re even quieter than _____ (another quiet person where I work).” I just get angry at that. What am I supposed to say to that?? I end up thinking people who make comments like this are rude. I get passive-aggressive and become even less talkative in their presence. “Screw them” is my general attitude. Another person at work made a comment about my demeanor, saying, “You’re so quiet!” I actually verbalized my feelings that time, saying, “Well, how do you expect me to act? You want me to be someone I’m not?”

If anyone wants to kill me for posting their quotes, feel free.

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